WASHINGTON, D.C. — An uncharacteristically rotund Pete Hegseth held a press conference to deny having any knowledge of what happened to all the leftover lobster that had been procured for the troops. ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌ ͏‌  Newsletter Sponsored by 𝘓𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘞𝘢𝘺 Morbidly Obese Pete Hegseth Denies Any Knowledge Of What Happened To Leftover Lobster For The Troops WASHINGTON, D.C. — An uncharacteristically rotund Pete Hegseth held a press conference to deny having any knowledge of what happened to all the leftover lobster that had been procured for the troops. Read more Democrats Expel Fetterman After Repeated Warnings To Stop Supporting America Thanks For Playing! Legendary New T-Shirts Now Available At The Babylon Bee Store 🇺🇸 A message from 𝘓𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘞𝘢𝘺 He Said He'd Never Write Another Book Like This — And That's Why You Should Buy It 🚨 Dr. Michael Youssef is a pastor who grew up in the Middle East, and he's watched the systematic Islamist takeover happen in real time. 𝗡𝗼𝘄, 𝗵𝗲'𝘀 𝘀𝗼𝘂𝗻𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗮𝗹𝗮𝗿𝗺 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝗖𝗵𝗿𝗶𝘀𝘁𝗶𝗮𝗻𝘀 𝗮𝗰𝗿𝗼𝘀𝘀 𝗔𝗺𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗰𝗮. 𝗧𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗴𝘂𝘆 𝗵𝗮𝘀 𝗮𝗰𝘁𝘂𝗮𝗹𝗹𝘆 𝘁𝗮𝗹𝗸𝗲𝗱 𝘁𝗼 𝗷𝗶𝗵𝗮𝗱𝗶𝘀𝘁𝘀, 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗵𝗲 𝘀𝗮𝘆𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗜𝘀𝗹𝗮𝗺𝗶𝘀𝘁𝘀' 𝘀𝘁𝗿𝗮𝘁𝗲𝗴𝘆 𝗵𝗮𝘀 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗴𝗲𝗱. Here is the "Unholy Alliance" playbook happening RIGHT NOW (👀): 1. 𝗘𝘅𝗽𝗹𝗼𝗶𝘁 𝗣𝗿𝗼𝗴𝗿𝗲𝘀𝘀𝗶𝘃𝗲 𝗽𝗼𝗹𝗶𝗰𝗶𝗲𝘀 to dismantle our nation's Biblical foundations. 2. 𝗦𝗶𝗹𝗲𝗻𝗰𝗲 𝗱𝗶𝘀𝘀𝗲𝗻𝘁 with labels like "Islamophobic" or "Christian nationalist." 3. 𝗪𝗲𝗮𝗽𝗼𝗻𝗶𝘇𝗲 the very freedoms these values created to burn the system down. 4. 𝗔𝗻𝗱 𝘄𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗰𝗼𝗺𝗲𝘀 𝗻𝗲𝘅𝘁 𝗶𝘀 𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗹𝗹𝘆🚩 🚩 🚩 𝗗𝗿. 𝗬𝗼𝘂𝘀𝘀𝗲𝗳 𝗸𝗻𝗼𝘄𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗲𝗻𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴, 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗵𝗲'𝘀 𝘀𝗵𝗼𝘂𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘀𝗽𝗼𝗶𝗹𝗲𝗿𝘀. In his new book 𝘼𝙣 𝙐𝙣𝙝𝙤𝙡𝙮 𝘼𝙡𝙡𝙞𝙖𝙣𝙘𝙚 (𝗨𝗦𝗘 𝗖𝗢𝗗𝗘: 𝗦𝗔𝗩𝗘𝟮𝟬), Dr. Youssef reveals the 12-point plan for the 2026 landscape. Some publishers were wary of releasing it (is it because of Chapter 3?!?!)—but the truth is too important to gatekeep. 𝗕𝗲𝗰𝗮𝘂𝘀𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗶𝘀 𝗮𝗹𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗱𝘆 𝗵𝗶𝘁𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗹𝗼𝗰𝗮𝗹 𝘀𝗰𝗵𝗼𝗼𝗹 𝗯𝗼𝗮𝗿𝗱, 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗸𝗽𝗹𝗮𝗰𝗲, 𝗺𝗮𝘆𝗯𝗲 𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗻 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗰𝗵𝘂𝗿𝗰𝗵. 𝗜𝘁'𝘀 𝗮𝗹𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗱𝘆 𝗵𝗶𝘁 #𝟭 𝗡𝗲𝘄 𝗥𝗲𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝗶𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗿𝗲𝗲 𝗔𝗺𝗮𝘇𝗼𝗻 𝗴𝗲𝗻𝗿𝗲𝘀, but why give your money to the tech overlords? 𝗣𝗿𝗲-𝗼𝗿𝗱𝗲𝗿 𝗶𝘁 𝗱𝗶𝗿𝗲𝗰𝘁𝗹𝘆 𝗳𝗿𝗼𝗺 𝙇𝙚𝙖𝙙𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙏𝙝𝙚 𝙒𝙖𝙮 𝘀𝗼 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗽𝘂𝗿𝗰𝗵𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝘀𝘂𝗽𝗽𝗼𝗿𝘁𝘀 𝗚𝗼𝘀𝗽𝗲𝗹 𝗺𝗶𝗻𝗶𝘀𝘁𝗿𝘆.   👉 Get the Book Here | Save 20% OFF with Code: SAVE20 SAVE Act Passes After Mike Lee Cleverly Changes Its Name To The 'Give Congress A Raise Act' Donald Trump Appoints Grand Admiral Thrawn To Lead The Carrier Strike Group In Persian Gulf Google Maps Subtracts Hour From Travel Time After Realizing Dad Driving Jew Converts To Christianity After Internet Commenter Says, 'Christ Is King, You Filthy Money-Grubbing Jew' Man Hires Oscars Orchestra To Play 'Wrap It Up' Music When Wife's Stories Go Too Long Gold Wins— America Is A Deeply Indebted Nation Facing A Very Divided World With WWIII At Its Doorstep…* Babylon's Best Peanut Butter Reinvented. Crafted in small batches on the banks of the Hudson River Valley, giv soft butter is an iconic American comfort food, upgraded. Organic roasted peanuts blended with pecans - bold, rich, sweet, salty and nostalgic. Use Code BEE for 20% OFF!* Banned By Amazon, But Not Illegal? These are 2026's hottest gadgets and DIY gifts that they don't want you to have. Quantity discounts are available, so get yourself more than one or as gifts for your friends and family. Check out these "banned" gadgets now.* Stand Up And Fight. There's no greater gesture of far-right extremist patriotism than buying a MyPillow direct from the source! Pick one up today and enjoy the best night's sleep in the whole wide world! Huge savings using code BEE*     *This is sponsored content. 45f7-h29p-9230-8jvn Stop Spam Folders From Silencing Satire. You deserve every punchline. Bee Mail puts our updates right where they belong—your Gmail Primary tab. Activate Bee Mail Now. Want us to stop emailing you? Unsubscribe here. Want a break? Click here to pause these emails for 14 days Latest News | Store | Download App | Subscribe PO Box 546, Jupiter, FL 33468 Copyright ©2026  The Babylon Bee, LLC. All rights reserved.